Tomorrow is our fifth anniversary, and I keep thinking a lot about this institution of marriage I was so petrified of. I had every reason to not want to do it, to not believe in it, to rely on my past and fear my future. I have to say that choosing to re-marry and believe in love was the greatest thing I have ever done! I know so many people no longer believe in marriage and love lasting, but I’m here to say I think marriage is the greatest thing we can do, and marrying the right person is the best thing that can happen to anyone in their lifetime! I’ll share more about us in true anniversary fashion tomorrow, but in honor of five years as husband and wife, I wanted to share my five favorite things about being married.
1. I truly have a best friend and advocate.
This year has been one of the hardest of my life. From infertility fears to becoming a mother to making some of the hardest decisions of my life with my career, life as a mother, and future, I can’t believe how many hours Jacob has listened and advocated for all of my dreams. He always wants what is best for me. He’s always there to support and encourage. He always picks up my calls no matter what. I couldn’t imagine this type of companionship even while dating, it’s truly remarkable!
2. Someone to share everything with
Even though sometimes that’s the last piece of cake, I truly enjoy that what’s his is mine and mine is his. We’ve always treated finances, problems, responsibilities, concerns, hopes, dreams, fears, and anything you can name as joint custody. It’s a pretty amazing thing from an economics standpoint to see your world double instead of the thought that you’re giving up half. I love an entire life revolves around another person and there’s always someone who has my back.
3. The inside jokes
I know that sounds funny, but when you experience so many things together and share the same weird sense-of-humor, you just pick some inside jokes up. I’m grateful to know there will always be something one of us can say or do to crack the other one up. I’m grateful someone has been around long enough to witness so many awkward and embarrassing moments that they can plentifully tease me about. I’m grateful I can do the same! It’s a pretty magical thing to share this with someone.
4. Growing and evolving together
I may still mispronounce that one word had he not helped clue me in on, and he may still own those awful pants. I love that we help each other reach for new dreams and goals, but we also support each other’s decisions to change and evolve. I originally thought this meant couples would grow apart, but it’s amazing to me how much more interesting we become to one another as we grow together.
5. Learning that love is about being selfless
Most people will tell you to look for what you can get out of it, and maybe that’s good advice while dating and deciding, but when actually married, the more you give the more you get. The more I put his needs first, the more he does the same. It’s a pretty awesome spiral to try to one-up each other in service and love.